Growing & Learning in Democratic Discipline


This site offers a radically new approach to bringing up children, wherein all forms of punishment are dispensed with, and replaced with the same civil and courteous behavior afforded associates and friends.

Throwing out the punitive approach, which is so pervasive and so traditional it is thought to be "natural", creates a revolutionary new parenting approach. It's author, Norm Lee, calls it 'The New Non-Punitive Parenting Paradigm', (NN-PPP) It is founded on fundamental respect for children as thinking and feeling human beings with full membership in the family. Central to this departure from the parent-centered authoritarian method is the concept/practice Norm calls "Democratic Discipline".

NN-PPP is neither theory nor speculation. It was developed in the 60s with the participation of Norm's two small sons and their mother. Henry David and Russell Bertrand, now approaching age 40, have proven by their lives the truth that decent, courteous, law-abiding, successful and happy children can be raised without any form of punishment whatever. Hence, the near-universal faith in punishment as a parenting tool is here exposed as unfounded and disproved.

- Norm

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"My best regards and thanks for your newsletters. They are really absolutely free of poisonous pedagogy and my friends and I appreciate them very much."

—— Alice Miller, Zurich, Switzerland, November 2000

The Norm Letter #7
October 2012

What You Can Leave Your Heirs
(Even If You're Living Below the Poverty Line)

On the death of a parent, there are many problems for survivors to handle at the worst of times . If dealt with early on, you can reduce or eliminate nearly all of them. Instead of bequeathing difficulties and stress for your children, you can spare them much trouble and expense. This could be your most appreciated legacy.

Here are seven bequests you can give your children, even if you're on Social Security, food stamps, or welfare.

1. To avoid the lengthy hassle of probate, arrange for a Living Trust, which includes power of attorney, distribution of assets, and your wishes concerning a monument, a plaque, memorial service, celebration of life. Clear up all debts so you leave no financial burdens for your children to bear, except perhaps a mortgage.

2. Assemble all vital information of your personal affairs, including legal documents that your family will need after you've gone such as birth certificate, marriage, divorce & death papers, savings & checking bank accounts, names & addresses & pnone numbers of those who must be notified.

3. Collect fotos, autobiography, family videos, geneology, early memories, diaries, important letters, journals, etc.

4. Consider organ donation. Total body donation eliminates thousands in expenses for funeral or cremation, casket, cemetary lot, & monument. My choice was Anatomy Gifts Registry in Glen Burnie, MD. (Call 800/300-5433) The service is free of money & hassle.

5. Spare your survivors the difficult task at a stressfull time by writing your own newspaper obituary; that way it can be done the way you want it. Type it and leave it with your vital info (#2 above).

6. In their youth, show them how to work by working with them. Be mindful that the only way they learn is by your example, good or bad.

7. If you have very little $$ inheritance to leave them, give them the tools and info they need to create their own "fortune". Here's what I did: When my children had grown and were well into their careers and making money, I gave each of them one (1) share of Coca Cola on direct purchase plan.With it I gave over 100 pages of instructions I had written, printed and bound, on how to easily invest in the stock market. This "book" was the result of months of research in many books on financial advice, and visits to several libraries to study Morningstar and other publications.
    At first I was not an investor myself, but for a year had been reading The Motley Fools and articles on Carlson's DRIP advice. When confident in what I was talking about, I began writing for my sons. Buy the best and bluest stock ("buy and hold"), was the wisest advice, I learned. My sons had the advantage of time; buy during youth and hold for the long term is the way to a modest fortune, I wrote. Now in their late forties, they are still investing, and have benefitted to buy their homes and more, as have I. Using dividend reinvestment you can build a nest egg with pocket change - if you start early.
    With as little as $10 or $25 a month to invest, beginners might search The Motley Fools ( and/or Charles Carlson's Search also the key words "direct investing" and "dividend reinvestment plans"
It's a start. -Norm

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Countries that protect children
from hitting/spanking/physical punishment,
and the dates of reform

Sweden - 1979, Finland - 1983, Norway - 1987, Austria - 1989, Cyprus - 1994, Italy -1996, Denmark - 1997, Latvia - 1998, Croatia - 1999, Bulgaria - 2000, Germany - 2000, Israel - 2000, Iceland - 2003, Ukraine - 2004, Romania - 2004, Hungary - 2005, Greece - 2006, Netherlands - 2007, New Zealand - 2007, Portugal - 2007, Uruguay - 2007, Venezual - 2007, Chile - 2007, Spain - 2007, Costa Rica - 2008, Republic of Moldova - 2009, Luxembourg - 2009, Liechtenstein - 2010, Tunisia - 2010, Poland - 2010 and Kenya - 2010


By Norm Lee (c.) 2002, is a free publication for those seeking happier and easier ways of bringing up children.

Chapter 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

PDF Version


To Prevent Hitting




One summer morning in 1933, three small children stood at the top of a stairway, their faces distorted in anguish. Slight of stature and barely out of childhood herself, their mother was crying, too. But her jaw was set in determination; she had told her children that she had to leave again, and this time there could be no coming back... Continue


Capitulo 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

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